Anticipation

It's been a while since I've written.  I've wanted to and I've had several post ideas circulating in my head but by the time I get some quiet time to myself I don't have the energy anymore.  My sister-in-law compared it to exercising.  Ha!  The past several weeks have just gotten away from me.  They haven't exactly been a whirlwind or anything but I think most people will understand when I say that life has been full of interruptions, distractions, and exhaustion (this is especially comprehensible to young moms).

We tried potty training a few weeks ago.

 

Note, I said "tried."  We made slow but steady progress during a week in which we basically didn't leave the house and I was in a state of constant vigilance, watching Abby for the slightest sign that she might have to go so I could help her learn the warning signs for herself.  We had half-accident after half-accident.  She would start to pee in her undies before she realized it then we would finish in the toilet.  Then we had a day where she actually gave me the heads up before the accident a few times and she only wet 2 pairs of undies! HURRAY!!!  The next day she woke up in a MOOD.  At this point in the week I was still asking regularly if she had to potty but if she said "no" I didn't override her.  I was trying to let her read her own body cues but just giving her reminders to pay attention.  It had worked the previous day but THIS day? Oh, THIS day she refused to sit on the potty AT ALL.  I read one book on potty training that said if your child was unwilling to sit on the toilet to put gentle but firm pressure on their shoulders and ease them down and make them stay for a few minutes before letting them up.  The book went on to say that your child might have a tantrum but let it run its course and it should be over in about 5 minutes and you can try again. HA!  That author never met my child (or any other strong willed child)!! Gentle pressure on her shoulders?  Really?  Is that all it takes for some children?  With Abigail I would end up feeling like I'd wrestled a wildebeest   5 minute tantrums?  My child can last WELL over an hour.  I've even seen her go two.  I know some people will read this and think that it's because I gave her the attention she wanted or that I made the tantrum worth her while.  I assure you, I did not.  But I digress... By midmorning she had already soaked through 3 pairs of underwear.  Shortly thereafter she climbed up on the couch, laid down and said "mommy, change diaper!" So I did.  I asked if she was sure she wanted a diaper she told me she did.  So be it.  She's supposed to be training.  I don't want to be a trained parent.  I put her back in a diaper.  Lest you think that was all for the day, allow me to share a few more anecdotes on her MOOD (dun dun DUNNNN).

First of all, Abby wanted to be attached to my side all day BUT I wasn't allowed to touch her affectionately. NO hugs.  NO kisses.  She wanted me to hold her but "no hands!"  How am I supposed to hold you without using my hands, child?  It was a "NO" kind of day.  Another example:

me: Abby do you want milk?

Abby: NOOOO

me: Do you want water?

Abby: NOOOO

me: Do you want juice?

Abby: NOOOO

me: are you just saying no to everything?

Abby: (gives me a deliberate and stubborn look and says) BUG!

I kid you not!

So, for now potty training is on hold.  The potty seat is available if she wants it (and she has sat on it a few times since) but I'm going to give it a few weeks before we try again.

Thankfully, not every day is like that and while she is always "strong willed" (yes, yes I am reading Dobson's book) we have some really marvelous days together that I just love.  Like this one:

And this one:

She has asked to paint almost everyday since.  She really got into it!

And who gets to hang out with this spunky little nut every day?  I DO!

Here Abigail styles her doll's dress as an avant garde hat.  It's a "headdress" (couldn't help it)!

This morning I woke up to my favorite alarm: the sound of Abigail singing and playing in her bed and finally calling "mommy!"  It's about a bajillion times better than the beep.Beep.BEEP. of the alarm I used to wake up to for work!  While I listened to her playing and talking to her dolls and teddy bear I was filled with a sense of excitement and anticipation for the little life that is still developing inside me.  I can't wait to look into his eyes, kiss his tiny fingers, and cuddle him while we nurse.  I REALLY can't wait to introduce Abby to her little brother.  She is SO into babies.  Her whole body language changes when she's around one.  At church she wants to hold and kiss the babies, she tries to give them their pacifiers, she tucks their blankets around them.  Sometimes, I start to feel overwhelmed by the thought of starting all over at the baby stage.  I mean, Abby is SOOOO much more interesting and fun now than when she was a baby.  I love that she can talk and communicate now.  We color and build forts and blow bubbles outside.  But then I realize it's only been two short years and in another 2 short years she'll be able to do even more and, better yet, her little brother will be able to do what she is doing now.  I can't wait to watch them play together- aww, who am I kidding?  I can't wait to play with them!  So this morning, as I listened to her singing and felt my little boy thumping around inside me I was full of anticipation for what the next few months will bring.  I even had the energy to get most of my to-do list done today.  Okay, we ended up eating scrambled egg burritos for dinner rather later than we should have because I didn't plan ahead (I mean seriously, these people want to eat THREE times a day, EVERYDAY-- how's a girl to keep up?).  BUT I did get to work some on Abby's super awesome, amazing present/project that I'm fixing up from a craigslist find. More on that later...  For now I leave you with this:  a happy mama, loving on her dear girl (who has the exact same color of blonde hair- I love that!).